Talking to a friend last evening I came to know that she is not happy, happy about the kind of life she has. She is twenty six, and she believes she has lost every hope in life to be happy. I tried to recoil her emotions and asked her not to lose hope, but what else I can ask a girl to do who recently lost her job and who never had a love life, and her personal disappointments is actually making her dull day by day, it’s not like she don’t know she is hampering her inner self, she knows it quite very well but she cannot hold her emotions on recent failures which she believes to be the reason why her family ignores her or don’t really love her. She said me “Dee I want to be happy, I want to get married, have a family, going to vacations, buy jewels, but I am not able to anything.” And I kept mum, what could I say to her, as I know some of the stupid things she did. I am not blaming her in anyways but when she was young she never gave a chance to. She made herself so tough that nobody could actually approach her, and the reason behind she felt cupids play to be stupid and rubbish which actually made her under confident in talking guys now a days. She is not introvert but when she speaks she talks about work and on an intellectual parameter because she cannot open up her real being. Her intelligence makes her argumentative which do not attract but distract people around herself. Then what could be done for her, because if I too speak to her about her snobbish behavior we will have huge argument leading to no conclusion. Then what? But at the same time I cannot go out and search a right guy for her, but if I am not able to do anything then why she just called me and puked everything out on me? Still questioning myself, she might just think I can have answers to all her queries and give her a secret to be happy. But I am not a “gyan guru”, but a simple human being. So what I told her? Any guesses
She might not have a very fulfilling love life or may be none, but she is in hundred time better position than those heartbroken people, who played their all luck but today aren’t happy. Love is not everything in life. It is not the only thing that can make us happy, yes though I completely agree we all need a love life. But having love life doesn’t make everyone satisfied, do they? Being satisfied and happy are two different poles. Is you are happy doesn’t mean you are satisfied but if you are satisfied you may be happy. But this is completely what I think individuals may differ.
Talking to old aged man in neighborhood made me feel that a person tries very hard to be happy throughout his life, but it get tougher when he says “I am satisfied”. He said me “every evening I get a my cup of tea and the newspaper I sit in my easy chair in the balcony, after couple of minutes I fold the newspaper and keep it aside and then start watching the children playing in the park they look very happy playing games but they are not satisfied no matters how long they play. Their mum made their own group they talk, laugh and enjoy others company but may be they are not satisfied, so how can I call myself a satisfied man. I have a great family, my partner, my children and my grand children, but there were so many different thing which could have made me satisfy but I didn’t because all my life I worked hard to fulfill needs of my family. It made happy, but I could have done more for them. I could have done something unique for me that would had made me accomplished, but I hadn’t so how can I call myself satisfied”
And here is the silver line. If you are doing something that is making you accomplished, means you are making yourself satisfied which eventually is making you happy. In our lives even tiniest things make us happy but not satisfied. Then what is necessary being happy or satisfied? This is question which no one can answer; every individual has their own opinion. But I want to say few lines more.
People if you are a failure in few attempts may be in love life or in pro life, which makes you feel your family is ignoring you or they don’t really love you, please never feel so. They would never try to make you feel inferior ever. It might because you asked them to do so which we generally ask from them by saying “give me some space” or when you fall in failures, it makes you rigid thus letting them make some distance from you. Remember family is something which comes to us naturally not by our choice, so there is born belongingness which can never ignore or dishearten you for any mean. And who can guarantee if you have a love life then you can have long happy life. And if don’t have a love life than go out and give yourself a chance spread your all wings out and fly, discover new people whom you can fall in love with. Flourish your all horizons. Every day is a new day and every day a new thought, so what are you waiting for.
After all tomorrow is a new day.
[Listening to Robindro Sangeet, today is pochishe boishak paying my homage and tribute to Robindro nath thakur. Love you tagore.]
Deepika….
